


Dance Dance, We're Falling Apart

by dinglesugdendinglesugden



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: M/M, aarons past, both go to counselling, dance, roberts past
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-13
Updated: 2017-06-13
Packaged: 2018-11-13 17:10:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11189607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dinglesugdendinglesugden/pseuds/dinglesugdendinglesugden
Summary: Robert and Aaron go to dance therapy class following advice from their counsellors and they meet for the first time whilst there





	Dance Dance, We're Falling Apart

**Author's Note:**

> I feel like they both need to go counselling on screen so I decided to write about it and it turned into dance.   
> Title comes from Fall Out Boy-Dance Dance  
> Tumblr: @robertjacobsuggers

It had been three weeks since Robert’s counsellor had suggested him to try a dance class. He had been going to his counselling sessions once a week for just over two months now, and she had suggested that he should go to the local dance class on a Saturday morning to help his mental health. She had given him a leaflet showing all the issues that dance would help: anxiety, depression, PTSD etc. That evening, Robert had read the leaflet in detail, and with a deep breath, he booked his place to start in a few weeks’ time.

Today was Saturday, and most importantly, Robert’s first dance class. To say he was nervous was an understatement; he had never done anything like this before and hoped that he didn’t bump into anyone who recognised him. Robert wasn’t quite sure what he had to wear, so he decided to put on his running shorts and an old baggy tee shirt with trainers that had probably never seen the light of day before.

 

* * *

 

Aaron had been going to his counsellor for six months, on advice from his family and friends. Except, he hadn’t really seen her. He felt like he didn’t need to go, and if he did, he was just giving in to all the problems people thought he had. He thought she was mad when she suggested for him to go to the local dance class but when he actually looked it up, he thought it seemed okay, just as long as it would sort him out.

He waited an entire week, talking himself out and back in to going to the class, nerves taking over his entire body. _‘How can this help anxiety?’_ he thought, _‘It’s just making me more anxious.’_  He decided to just suck it up and if he didn’t like it, he didn’t have to go again. After putting on his joggers and a lighter hoodie, he grabbed his keys and walked to his car.

 

* * *

 

 

Robert stood in the corner of the room, watching on as the class (filled with females) sorted themselves into positions. He felt as though he was the only new person there, so he just followed everyone else’s lead and began trying to look like he knew what he was doing. The door opened as Robert had almost ‘perfected’ his stance, making everyone turn to the back of the room and watch as the dark-haired man clambered in. “Sorry.” He had said in a gruff tone, before walking over to the corner where Robert was stood.

The teacher had talked them through the first couple of steps, throwing a few “chasse’” and “jeté’” into the mix, earning nods from what Robert had assumed to be the returning class members. Aaron leaned forward and tapped Robert on the shoulder, “Oi. Do you have any idea what she’s going on about?” He asked.

Robert smirked and said “Nope. You?”

Aaron’s face said it all. Of course he didn’t understand her. “I’m Aaron.” He announced, before nodding to the blonde man.

“Robert.” He had replied.

Suddenly, the entire class moved to the left, their legs carrying them delicately. The only people who hadn’t moved had been Aaron and Robert, who now stood there completely puzzled.

“Boys! You have to focus! Here, follow me. You lift your left leg up slightly and pop off your right leg to carry you.” The teacher demonstrated.

Robert and Aaron followed her, both of them landing heavily, causing a louder noise than when 20 others did it. They looked at each other, smiling tightly and lifting their brows up.

“Mm, you’ll get there I suppose.” She chastised.

 

* * *

 

“Great class today! I look forward to seeing you all at the same time next week.” The teacher announced as everyone was either picking up their bags or gulping masses of water. Robert and Aaron were sat on the floor next to each other, Robert’s hair flat against his forehead, sticking to him and Aaron breathing heavily, red in the face.

Neither of them wanted to admit it, but dancing had taken it out of them. Aaron was no stranger to the gym, but the mental side of dance had been as equally as exhausting as the physical attribution. His chest was heaving under the intense workout he had just done, holding some woman up over his head. Robert’s muscles ached having not done exercise on this scale for quite some time. His legs felt like jelly, as though they would give way from underneath him. The teacher had Robert working on stretching his limbs out more, making sure that his toes were pointed on every move.

Aaron stood up first, extending his arm to help lift Robert up. His arms were in agony, but that was okay. He had to admit that the class was actually alright. Obviously there was no miracle cure, but he seemed to have come out his shell just that little bit more. In the past, he would have never offered his hand to anybody, he would just keep them hidden in his pockets, but here he was, practically holding Roberts hand.

“I’ll see you next week?” Robert asked, almost shyly as he stood up fully. Aaron released his hand and just nodded before picking his bag up, trying not to wince at the weight, and walked out of the door.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Although the first class had helped Robert slightly, he knew that it wasn’t going to make him ‘right’ straight away; if ever. He came home exhausted and went straight into the shower to rid himself of the sweat. He thought he was fine, even when he was sat watching the early afternoon TV, but then Victoria came home with a box of Robert’s old things, including photographs. He cautiously opened the book, the bind of it cracking because of its age. The first photo caused him to shut it straight away. He couldn’t look at him, even after all these years. It had been fifteen years and the bruises Robert was physically scared with was still stuck with him mentally. He remembered every last detail; the innocent kiss from the farm hand, Jack walking in and dropping the rope he was holding, the shouting, Robert being dragged away by his collar, Jack striking Robert against his face repeatedly. Every time he was his dads face, he was that scared teenager again, remembering all the traumatic things that had happened in his short life. It had taken him fifteen years to admit that he is bisexual, all because he was scare that he would be beat up again, even after his dad had died. Robert’s bad mental health wasn’t just because of that, no. It also didn’t help that at the age of fourteen, he witnessed his mum being burnt to death. That would stick with him forever. He will never forget the feeling of wanting to run in to save her, but knowing it was too late. He’ll never forget finding out that it was his own _brother_ who did it, who killed their mum.

Aaron led in bed when he got home, his upper body aching. He thought back to his first counselling session, his therapist asking him about his most traumatic ordeal. Aaron didn’t know what to say, it felt too personal even though he had already told a court full of people what his monster of a father did to him. He remembered being eight years old and crying in bed, not being able to move, his entire body paralyzed. He remembered it happening again, and again, until he was sixteen years old and managed to fight his way out of it and run away. He remembered just a few months back, having to open up about one of the worst times in his entire life in front of people he has never met before, waiting for them to make a decision about if he was telling the truth or not.  He remembered his therapist sitting in shock as Aaron talked her through what happened to him, and the shock on her face when he carried on. He talked about how Jackson died. How none of them could stop crying. How he regretted what he did, but knew that he couldn’t see Jackson carry on in the darkness he was in.

They both knew that it would take a lot for their mental health to be better than it had been for years, but they also knew they would never be a hundred percent perfect. After all, who is?

 

* * *

 

A week had passed since the first class, which meant that it was time for the second one. Robert and Aaron gravitated towards one another yet again, both laughing as they struggled to do even some of the most basic moves. Robert’s muscles ached after the first twenty minutes, the teacher making him do the moves he watched Aaron do last week. His legs felt like jelly, struggling to hold people up at first, but after a few more goes he found his position and could do it easily enough.

It was obvious that the girls admired the two boys in the class, batting their eyelashes at them as they did the ‘manly’ dance moves. At the break of the session, Robert watched on as Aaron was swarmed by girls, one of them actually touching his biceps. He chuckled at Aarons apparent uncomfortableness and walking over to rescue him. Robert seemed to have turned the charm on with Aaron, the girls noticing and walking away embarrassed.

“If only they knew they were barking up the wrong tree.” Aaron said before taking a sip of his water.

“Gay?” Robert asked.

Aaron rolled his eyes and said “Yeah. Not a problem is it?”

Robert’s cheeks flushed darker than they already were, “N-no! I’m bisexual myself!” He stuttered out.

That was the first time Robert had ever come out to someone who was practically a stranger. He didn’t even think before he said it. He knew this was a good thing, but now his nerves were kicking in.  Aaron just nodded in response just before the teacher announced that the session was now resumed.

 

* * *

 

 

Six weeks had passed and every Saturday morning, Robert and Aaron continued to go to their dance class. They had learnt different types of dance and both of them could feel themselves becoming mentally better, although they weren’t perfect. Alongside this, Aaron had seen his counsellor on a regular basis, finding it slightly easier to open up to her. He also didn’t realise it at the time, but he mentioned Robert to her more times than necessary, smiling when he did so.

As well as his mental health, Robert could also see his body changing due to the exercise he was doing. Granted, he didn’t have a six pack, but his arms were beginning to become more defined, his chest growing as his abdominals grew tighter. He was in the best shape he had been in for years.

This Saturday morning, the class started a new style of dance. Ballroom. Obviously, the most common thing for them to do would be to partner up with a female, but because they were both heavily outnumbered, they decided to partner up together. It was decided that Robert would lead Aaron, due to him being taller, so he put his right hand on Aaron’s back, while Aarons left hand was placed at the very top of Roberts arm. Their hands met, the second time that had touched like this. Roberts fingertips were ice cold, he had always had poor circulation. Robert left foot moved forward, Aaron’s right leg going back. Their knees bashed against one another because Aaron didn’t move his leg back quick enough, Robert narrowly missing stamping down onto his foot.

“Your backs need to be straighter,” The teacher instructed, “Robert, you need to step forward slower, you may be leading your partner but you aren’t swinging him about.”

They both smiled to each other at that and did the move again, following what they were taught to do. This time they managed it, and carried on, Robert carefully steeping forward, whilst Aaron moved back. They went around in a square shape, turning at every step. It took them a while to get into the swing of things, occasionally bumping along the way but they managed it in the end. The teacher told them to stop and carried on with the lesson, throwing in more complex steps. Aaron and Robert carried on practising with each other, taking this dance routine the most serious they have in all the weeks they had been going. Aaron could feel his back pulling from being completely straight, his neck getting stiff. Their hands had been held together tightly for so long that they were beginning to get clammy but neither of them really cared. It felt natural.

“Robert” Aaron practically whispered as they continued to dance. “Can I get your number?”

Robert’s face almost lit up, a smile creeping across his face. He nodded and their hands finally parted so he could get his phone out, both of them swapping numbers.

A few hours later, when Robert was sat outside his counsellors’ office, his phone buzzed in his pocket. It was a text from Aaron saying “Date?” Robert smiled at his screen and responded, “Definitely”

They knew they both had a long way to go still, but with the help of counselling, dance and each other, they could definitely do it.


End file.
